Weird sights

Since I've had my rant for the month, let us go on to lighter things. Can you possibly tell me who in the world would buy a Walt Disney "Cinderella" toaster. Now I can understand a Cinderella lunch box, book bag, pencil case, sneakers, or something like that for kids but a toaster? Yes it's true. If you go to Zellers you will be able to buy your very own Cinderella toaster. I'm not joking, they actually sell Cinderella toaster's there. (No they are not selling them in the toy department, but in the kitchen appliances for adults.) Even stranger, if they are selling them that means that someone is actually buying them. If it's a trend, then why not Bugs Bunny toasters which would say "what's up doc?" to let you know the toast was done or a Snow White apple peeler?
On a street corner in Montreal I saw a really strange personage the other day. (In a town of strange people he was really strange) Imagine a guy, trying to look like a gangsta rapper. He was wearing low (really low, somewhere around mid-thigh) jeans. You could see his not too clean jockey boxers, and tucked into his jockey's was a rumpled undershirt tight over his pot belly. Now you must add big fake silver jewelry, small sunglasses crooked on his nose, a hairnet and a baseball cap set crooked. To top it all off, like a cherry on a sundae, he was wearing his mother's fur coat. Of course this guy must have been almost six feet tall and his mother was obviously about five feet. The overall effect had to be seen to be believed. There he was on the corner trying to look tough, flipping a "loony" (for those who don't know, a Canadian 1$ coin) and all around him people kind of looking away with an half concealed grin on their faces. Mind you he probably thought that he was the epitome of cool. All of this and to top it off, he was as white as wonder bread.

All day today, Blogger seems to have become bilingual. Certain directions and words are in German. Not everything, just certain things. Why German? Deity only knows, I use French and English on my computer so why German. As we say in French "mystère de boule de gomme" (loosely translated "bubble gum mystery " don't ask me why.)

Duel

Sometimes driving to work feels like being in Spielberg's 1971 film "Duel". You know the one... where a car driver gets chased by a psychopathic truck. "A duel is about to begin between a man, a truck, and an open road. Where a simple battle of wits is now a matter of life and death."
I have been driving along the same road for the last 15 years to get to school and during this time the quantity of trucks has quadrupled. Last Thursday while driving along, there were so many trucks in the right lane that it was like driving beside a train. They were nose to tail for kilometres. Rather intimidating. Of course all these trucks slowed the traffic down to a crawl since all the cars squeezed into one lane. (A person would have be be completely deranged to want to drive encircled by these mastodons.) To make matters worse from time to time one of then would pull into the left lane and slowwww down traffic even more. (Who's going to argue with a giant 18 wheeler truck when it butts in front of you, forcing you to put on the brakes and slew to keep from hitting him.)
All the pundits tell us that trucks are needed for the economy and that business can't get along without them. Maybe that's true but maybe we should also look at the cost of having so many trucks on the road. The philosophy of "just-in-time" inventory and rapid delivery might be nice for business but I'm not so sure that it's good for the rest of us.

• Trucks pollute. One truck puts out about as much pollution as 150 cars and they are not even held to the same standards as cars. Most big trucks do not even have antipollution devices not being obligated by law. A train pulling the equivalent of 280 trucks of freight produces the equivalent of 30 trucks of pollution. (Could be a lot less if we electrified the railroads like the European rail system. We have much cheaper and cleaner electricity here than them. I'm sure we could come up with a hybrid system for when electrification is impossible.)
• Trucks usually cause traffic congestion at the peak traffic hours. Though I have no statistics, empirically from my observation, the days when traffic is the slowest are invariably the days when there is the most truck traffic. All that stalled traffic is not very good for air pollution.
  
• I was once told by an engineer who had worked in Transport Québec that a truck had a negative impact on roads equivalent to 10,000 cars. Everyone has seen and driven in the runnels carved into the road by truck wheels. They were certainly not made by cars since they are wider than any car width. For example, the Champlain Bridge in Montreal underwent major repairs a few years ago and these repairs were supposed to last 50 years. It has now been ascertained that they'll barely last 15 years because of all the heavy weight truck traffic.
• Compared to the wear and tear that trucks cause to the roads, they do not pay even a fraction of the the costs. Yes, they pay the same fuel taxes, license fees as car drivers but a car does not put the wear and tear on our road system that a truck does.
  
• Supposedly trucks are more economical than trains. Of course they are, they don't have to pay for the upkeep of the roads, like the railroads do. Make them pay the real price for their usage and wear on the roads and they would probably be much more expensive than the railroads.
• How many times have you seen accidents involving cars and truck. I know truck advocates say that car drivers are dangerous and cut in front of trucks. This is probably true but that does not cover all accidents. Where I live there was a major accident when an eighteen wheeler ploughed into stopped cars at a red light. The driver had been asleep. People died. In another accident on Highway 40 in the east end of Montreal, a tanker trailer truck again ploughed into stopped traffic on the highway killing many people. I've seen trucks pulling out onto a boulevard, turning left, crossing the boulevard and blocking it from side to side in the face of oncoming traffic. This was in the middle of winter, during a snow storm in icy conditions. I've seen trucks turned over in curves, trucks dropping their loads in the middle of the road, trucks losing control on the highway and wiping out a couple of cars on the way. When you are in a car, what chance do you have against them? I sometimes feel that certain truck drivers know this and use it to drive with impunity.
• Another problem is that many trucks should not even be on the road, bald tires, brakes shot, lights out etc.. (To be fair there are also many cars that shouldn't be on the roads either. Maybe we should have MOT inspections every year like in the UK. Cars and trucks that don't pass get their licence plates removed until repaired.) Every year in the spring the transport inspectors stop trucks but there are too many trucks and not enough inspectors, so many get away with it.
• There is also the fact that trucks are getting bigger and bigger all the time. The standard size is now a 53' trailer, whereas a few years ago they were much smaller. There are also more and more "train routier" road trains as we call them here. You know the trucks pulling two 53' trailers (That must come out to 120' of rig counting the truck itself.) Not light loads either, I've seen them pulling two flatbeds full of logs. No matter what they tell me, I'll never believe that they have full control of their rigs. If an emergency happens they'll never be able to control the load.
  

What would I do if I had the power? Well first of all I'd pass a law saying that trucks may only be used to deliver freight within 100 kilometres. Anything outside of that radius must be carried by freight train. There are now special freight cars where the truck drives up unto the freight car and leaves the trailer which is then carried to destination. Once arrived, it is then delivered to its final destination by another truck. Money must be spent to electrify the railroad grid to make it even less polluting.
I would have hours of exclusion, morning and night, where trucks are not allowed on the roads around a city, to help with traffic congestion.
Trucks have to be smaller and carry a lighter load to help with road deterioration and I would ban "train routier" and oversize loads.
There would be new much higher licensing fees to make trucks pay their fair share of the road usage and there must be yearly inspections for all vehicles.
OK I'm drastic, but I'm also tired of feeling that I am driving the highways and roads on sufferance. So there is my rant for the month.

Jazz is right...

After having read my lil sister's blog, I must come to the same conclusion as she did. That is really the PINKY SWEET HURL INDUCING AWARD of the year. It is so frothy pink that even Pink Barbie would be nauseous. In the light of this realization, I have marshaled my meagre artistic talents, Adobe Illustrator, an Illustrator template (You didn't really think I could do something artistic by myself did you?) and made a new logo for the award. I hope that the person who designed the original will not be too upset and curse me to the nether regions of hell.

New Award

Em has kindly given me an award... *Blush*. "The Nice Matters Award" This award is given for being a nice blogger. So I'll pass on my good fortune to some other bloggers that I've been following for a while.
First of let me be accused of nepotism because I'm going to give the first one to my lil sister Jazz. I know she tries to make out that she's a world weary, cynical broad, but underneath it all she is a very nice lil sister to have.
My second choice is everyone's favourite curmudgeon, Ian who despite his grinch like attitude at times, really cares or he wouldn't rant so hard.
Then I'll add Voyager, a nice lady mountain trekker (we both love the mountains), who is always worth reading.
Next is Tai, a fellow traveller, the one and only who has moved into a new house and a new job.
Then here's Dr. Deb, she always writes a very interesting blog about psychology, and people.
Finally Choochoo living in Hellhole Norway in a new apartment as strange as the last. May her studies go as she wishes.
And I'll add one more, Cs, not last as an afterthought, but because she has already received this award from Em. He beat me to the punch.
Enjoy and thanks

Following others, what I did

Having no inspiration these days, I've decided to do like Ian and my little sister Jazz and tell a bit about what I've done in my life. Let's see it's hard to get going since I don't feel that it is an extraordinary life, but here goes.
I'll start with the important stuff, stuff that we often overlook. I've been married for 31 years to Mrs. BB. (Doesn't seem that long but I guess time flies when we're having fun.) We've raised two wonderful children who are now intelligent, productive, stable adults. I've also been teaching for 30 years and I still love doing it. Having had a family early on Mrs. BB and I didn't travel much until our kids grew up a couple of years ago, but we have been making up for lost time.

I've gone trekking with Mrs. BB in the Parc de la Gaspésie. We crossed the whole park from one end to the other (over 100km) across some of the highest mountains in the southern part of Québec. The whole trip took us about 10 days and when we finally came straggling into civilization it took us a while just to get used to it. You don't know how good a cold beer tastes until you are sitting on the terrace with one, after having completed the last 20 kilometres across "le Mont Albert", one of the highest of the mountains, with a full pack. There we were sitting at a table, dirty, sweaty, tired, in hiking boots, with a 35 pound pack at our feet and all these tourists kept staring at us as if we had come from another planet...

I've gone trekking in Nepal with my little sister Jazz and Mr. Jazz. It had always been my dream to go trekking to Everest. Not climb it, just get close to it. In 2000 that is what I did. We got to Pheriche at 4600 meters when we both got a good dose of altitude sickness. Realizing that no mountain is worth dying for we started back down. Since we had more time, we were able to take trails that the tourists usually don't take, so we ended up on a trail above Pangboche in what can only be described as a perfect day. Breathtaking scenery, beautiful weather and a path that we had pretty much to ourselves. Like my sister I've visited the Swayambunath and the Bodnath stupas which are the most beautiful in Nepal. I also visited Tengboche Monastery, one of the oldest and most sacred.

I have (along with my wife) also been to the Neolithic tombs of Newgrange and Knowth in Ireland. They were awe inspiring. Imagine a tomb that was built around 3200 BC. That is 5000 years old, almost 1000 years before the pyramids. These tombs were built without any metal tools and yet are so well built that on the winter solstice as the sun rises its light races across the ceiling and hits the main chamber just as the sun clears the horizon and then retreats across the floor. We've also visited Avesbury and Stonehenge as well as many other neolithic stone circles in the Orkneys and Outer Hebrides. It is humbling to realize what our ancestors could do with so little.



We've also hiked along Hadrian's wall. Over hills and ridges, it goes on as far as the eye can see. Those Romans sure knew how to build.








I've climbed Ben Nevis, the highest mountain in the UK, as well as assorted other mountains in the highlands. One of them was beside the Loch Ness and we could see the loch from one end to the other.




I've walked and climbed in Edward's I castles in Wales. They are truly something to see, being the state of the art in military technology of the 13ht and 14th century. What struck me the most though, was that, although the castles are now in ruins, the towns that grew up around them are all thriving. Maybe there is hope for mankind yet.



I've sat in the Cathedral of Notre Dame de Paris and listened to a choral singing a Gregorian Chant as it echoed across the thousand year old church, with sunlight steaming through the stained glass.



We've walked in the desert of Tunisia and haggled with merchants of the Souk El Bey of Tunis. (It helps to have a friend living there to show you the ropes. ;o)) And we've walked around one of the most complete Coliseums outside of Rome.


I spent ten years in the artillery (army reserve) and finally finished as a Captain and CO of the 58e Batterie where I had started. Got to do many things in the meantime including jump school in Edmonton. (Never got my wings since I busted a knee and had to leave before the end)

I've read more books than I can count. If I had all the books that I've read since I was a kid I could probably start a pretty decent library. Reading and books are one of man's greatest inventions.

I guess I could go on and on. Doing this exercise at least makes you realize just how much we have done in our lives. Hey and the best is still to come. ;op

Back to school special

Last Friday, we all trooped back to school. Summer sure went quickly. The renovations finally finished around the 15th of August and I spent the remaining week in Gatineau with Mrs. BB. Many cities could take example from the National Capital Region (Ottawa and Gatineau). The region is a paradise for those of us who like outdoor sports. There is one hundred seventy kilometres of bike trails all around the region. Not trails that share the road with cars, but wide paved bike trails made especially for people who like to ride. As opposed to Montreal all these trails are joined together so you easily get from point A to Point B with a minimum of fuss.
Then there is the Parc de la Gatineau. This is a large park that is just beside and inside the city of Gatineau. It is a 363 square km triangular shaped park that includes many mountains, lake, and streams. The park's location in the Gatineau Hills makes it a popular destination for cross-country skiing and biking. There are almost 200 km of cross-country trails and many of these trails are used by bikes and hikers during the summer. Since the terrain is very hilly it's a good thing to be in shape before riding up into the hills.

In Gatineau Park you will also find William Lyon MacKenzie King's Estate called Kingsmere. It is open to the public and can be accessed by car or by bike if you don't mind pedalling up some rather steep hills. Mackenzie King was the 10th Prime Minister of Canada and was the longest serving Prime Minister in British Commonwealth history (1921-26, 1926-1930, 1935-48). In his personal life MacKenzie King was rather eccentric. He was a firm believer in spiritualism and communed with Leonardo da Vinci, Sir Wilfrid Laurier, his dead mother and several of his pet Irish terriers (all named Pat, makes it easier to remember names I suppose).












Another of his eccentricities was his fondness for building "abbey" ruins from parts of old Ottawa buildings that had been torn down. So all around his grounds you can find "ruins" of old abbey buildings. (I've been to England and believe me these "ruins" are not even close to the ruins of Riveaulx or Melrose Abbeys)
Something that not many Canadians know is that he was the prime minister that first created the notion of Canadian citizenship . This was put in place on January 1st 1947, before that we were British citizens who lived overseas. In honour of this, Mackenzie King was awarded Canadian citizenship certificate number 0001. A little known fact is that Canada's first natural born Canadian is still living today in New Brunswick.
Here are a couple of more pictures taken whilst riding the Gatineau bike trails.

Wreck of a "draveur" boat

Parliament Buildings along the Ottawa River

Denizens of the river

Oh the irony...

How's this for ironic? Our beloved ex-Canadian, Conrad Black has written a biography of Richard Milhous Nixon.
For those of you who are too young, Richard Nixon was the 37th President of the United States. He also has the distinction of being the only US president to resign. Of course, he didn't have all that much choice, it was that or be impeached by Congress. This all came about in his second term when it was discovered that he had authorized and then had a hand in covering up a break in at the Democratic Election Headquarters. Known as the Watergate Scandal, after the hotel where the break in occurred, this finally lead to his downfall. During the investigation, it was brought to light, that not only was there a break in at the Watergate but also illegal wiretaps, other break ins, use of confidential medical records to discredit an opponent and assorted other dirty tricks. There was even a presidential enemy list of people who opposed his presidency. (Kind of makes you think of a more recent president doesn't it? )

Now on to the author of this new biography, Lord Conrad Black. Conrad Black is a newspaper mogul who was recently convicted of fraud and obstruction of justice. He now faces a possible long jail sentence, we'll know in November. Lord Black has always been a rather right wing law and order type of person and he and his wife have often railed about leftist softies. Using his various media outlets, Black denounced Canada's welfare system as "an overgenerous reinsurance policy for an underachieving people"; railed against high taxes and unions supporting worker's rights. He once called an Ontario liberal politician the Salvador Allende of Canada and was quoted as saying that he was " trying to strangle, disembowel, and immolate the vestiges of the incentive-based economy." During the strike at his Calgary Herald newspaper, Conrad Black even called the Bishop of Calgary a "jumped-up little twerp"and a "prime candidate for exorcism" because he dared to back the striking workers.
After the publication of Black's biography of Richard Nixon, he was quoted as saying “It’s hard not to acknowledge [Richard Nixon’s] sleazy side, which I do not have,* ”
Yeah right, it takes one to know one.

* bold italics are mine

Relativity

Well we just got over a big thunderstorm, plenty of rain, thunder and lightning. It's grey, wet and humid and that means that there'll be no work today. Mrs, BB and I are getting the front of the house redone. Before, the side walk was cracked and slowly sinking into the earth and the retaining wall, built of railroad ties, was disintegrating. (Hey the railroad ties were not my idea, the previous owners had put them in. They are a real problem because you just can't throw them into a land fill because of the creosote. ) But I am digressing, so this year we decided to have the sidewalk, driveway and retaining walls redone. So we got a bunch of contractors to submit for the job and finally chose one. We were told that it would take about three weeks, the last of June (finally started the first week of July) and the first two of July. Lo and behold we are now the first week of August and they are still not done. They are not even close to completing the job. Mind you the work that has been done, has been very well done.

Now comes my point, Albert Einstein stated in his Theory of Relativity, that time is relative. So it is between the time estimates of building contractors and real time. The contractor will give you an estimated time based on the optimistic assumption that

1. The weather will be perfect for the whole time.
2. Murphy's law will be suspended
3. There will be no other jobs to interfere with yours
4. There will be no statutory construction holidays in between. (In Québec they are obliged to give a "vacances de la construction" at the end of July.)
   

Now this is patently impossible. Based on the construction work we have had done in the last couple of years, I'd say that you must take the contractor's estimated time of completion (E.T.C.) and multiply by 2 to get the real time of completion (R.T.C.) so ETC x 2= RTC. Following this line of logic three weeks will become 6 weeks, which is about right. Another way might be to calculate using workdays. Three weeks is 21 days. 21 days / 3.5 days a week of work = 6 weeks. This can be called BB's Theory of Relative Construction Time.
So there we are. These R.T.C. estimates seem to be pretty much in line with what I have observed for all types of construction. If they say it'll take 2 hours, it'll be closer to 4 or 5. If they say a week, it'll be about 2-2.5 weeks. Having also done renovations, I would say that BB's Law of Relative Construction Time should also apply to whatever construction project you put your hand to. If you think it'll take a day to complete you can be pretty sure that it'll take about twice that. Now don't get me wrong I'd much rather they take their time to do the work and get it right, than rush a job and have to start over. It's just that if you are planning your summer it might be nice to have a timetable that is a little more exact. Since I'm a teacher it's not much of a problem since I can be home most of the time that they are working, but for someone with limited vacation time it must be rather complicated.

Odds and sods

Having been absent last week and also having a brain that is on vacation has meant that I haven't had much to say these last couple of weeks... and I still don't have much to say. So here are some odds and sods that I picked up these last weeks.
A couple of days ago I was riding my bike through Ste-Anne de Bellevue near the locks between Lac St-François and Lac des Deux Montagnes when I decided top stop for a couple of minutes and admire the scenery. There was a big house boat parked at the entrance of the locks and on there were two couples about my age. Now boat owners are often my age, especially the guys. (From my small experience the gals seem to be much younger. ) Anyhow back to the story, on this boat they were having a party, at two o'clock in the afternoon, in front of a whole pile of people walking along the waterfront. Now having a party in itself is not a problem, but having a karaoke party when you can't hold a tune and having your friends dancing with a Labatt blue in their hands lacks a certain amount of class, especially when the singer ad libs words to the song. Now close your eyes and imagine, greying 55 + guy with a beer gut overhanging his speedo, crooning into a microphone with the volume turned wayyyy up. Shudder.... total lack of class. Obviously having a bundle of cash doesn't procure automatic class.
As you all know from a previous blog, I bought myself a new digital reflex camera and I've been taking pictures ever since trying out all the functions. Here are some of the pictures.

Lamp post near my place
Sunset in GatineauChutes de Coulonge

Chutes de Coulonge
Panoramic of Lac Pink
Parc de la Gatineau
Lac Pink

I love taking pictures of flowers .

My first award, I'd like to thank...

An award for me??? *BLUSH*, stammer, (insert tears here) really you shouldn't have... gimme that thing. I'd like to thank Ian for thinking of me, my parents for making me who I am, my family for believing in me and my dream, the blog sphere, the world, the ahhhhhhh. (Lapses into stammering gibberish and tears)
Ok back to to reality, Ian is a great blog writer (a great writer period) and to have him choose me with praise, well it's a great honour and made my day. Not that we write our blogs for praise or awards, we mostly write because it's a way of throwing our message in a bottle into the wide sea of the internet. By the way Ian here's a little piece of linguistic trivia for you, the word schmooze comes from the late 19th century Yiddish word shmuesn which means to converse or chat.
Am I a schmoozer? Yes sir, give a me table, preferably on a terrace, some good strong coffee (or a Guinness), and some friends and we'll re-wire the world in no time. Blogs are just another way to schmooze, except we are a little farther apart. We put out our ideas and comment on the ideas of others...we schmooze.
Now for my choices to get the schmoozer award.
Choochoo is funny, with an off the wall sense of humour, and lives in a pretty weird town. (I thought she lived in the USA, but I heard through the branches that it is in Norway. I didn't think Norway could be so strange.). I always love reading her latest adventures. So Choochoo gets one. Then I'll nominate Evil Spock because I'd like to sit down with him and plan his race to world domination. (Can't be worse than Bushie and he's a lot more intelligent and funny.) Dr. Deb is my favourite shrink in the blog sphere and I would love to sit down and schmooze with her about the human condition. Her posts are always interesting and thought provoking. There are many others that I'd give the prize to, such as Jazz (my lil sister, she's funny and irreverent and I made her what she is today...LOL), Ian who nominated me, Voyager with her backyard chaos, Tai with her superb photos and L.B.D. ;o), cs a blogger I've just started following who has a definite knack with a camera and tells it as it is and Em a dad like me but woe is me, they have already been awarded the prize by others. ;o(

Good vibrations et al.

meme |mēm| noun Biology an element of a culture or system of behaviour that may be considered to be passed from one individual to another by non genetic means, esp. imitation.



I've been tagged by my lil'sister Jazz as to the five things that give me good vibrations. My darling sister is always thinking up ways of complicating my nice smooth life. After much thought, head scratching and cognition, I have come up with the following five things.

The first and second are no brainers. The first is of course Mrs. BB who has put up with me lo these 31 years and believe me I am not always easy to put up with. After 31 years it is no longer a great emotional passionate affair, but has morphed into a lasting, comfortable, love. It is like the difference between a new snazzy pair of shoes and a well worn pair of slippers. Which is more comfortable? My wife completes me in a way that is hard to describe. When she is absent, there is a part of me that is missing, a malaise, something that is not right. When she is there, even if we are both doing our different things, I can feel her presence and that is an eminently comforting and wonderful feeling. So yes she is a big part of my good vibrations.

The second thing that is a part of my good vibrations are my two children, BB's daughter and BB's son. They are now adults and are flying by themselves, but when I look at them my heart swells with pride because they have become adults to be proud of. It's funny because when I give them a hug, I do not just see the adult they are, but the baby smiling at me, the small child showing me the carrot from the garden, tears because of scraped knees, the children doing their homework, the ados going to their first dance, their prom night, his face lighting up as we discuss programming and OS systems, university graduation (my daughter winning the two prizes for micro-biology). I see their whole lives go by and that definitely gives me good vibrations.

The third is trekking in the mountains. I love trekking because of the sense of solitude. Making it to the top of a mountain with nobody around gives one a feeling of peace that is hard to describe. The wind whistling across the rock and remnants of winter snow, the austere beauty of the surrounding landscapes, the solitude, the stark white of a cloud against the deep blue of the sky, the chill of the air at altitude. It all makes me think of a line from the poem "High Flight" by Pilot Officer Gillespie McGee; "Put out my hand and touched the face of God." This line of poetry pretty much says it all.

Here is my fourth, books. I love to read and I probably have more books at home that many bookstores. I love to read and regularly have to bring boxes of books to my local library since they have taken over every possible nook and cranny in the house. Thank goodness that Mrs. BB also loves to read because this could have been a definite problem. I can read for hours at a time and get through a 300 page book in less than a couple of days. Love of reading and books is one of the greatest gifts my parents gave me. When I was young they would always find some money to buy a Scholastic book at school. Books are a great invention, hours of pleasure, easy to carry and use, never need batteries. They can be taken anywhere and when trekking in a lost land can be used as fire starter and toilet paper in an emergency. LOL ;o)

My fifth is travelling. We love to travel, not go south to a Club Med, but really travel and get to know the people and culture of the country we are visiting. Since we usually stay for quite a few weeks and we are not rich, we usually end up camping most of the time. In England, Wales, Scotland and Ireland, they have a well organized system of camp grounds. Staying at a camp gound permits us to meet the people of the place, talk with them and learn how they live. If you want to know how people live, go grocery shopping at their local Tesco or Morrison's. Travelling like this has permitted us to meet so many fantastic, helpful people and see things that ordinary tourists just never see. The local people are always willing to tell you about this great place that you must visit. Travelling opens our horizons and makes one realize that under the skin we are all the same, all having the same hopes, loves and fears no matter where they are.

Now to whom should I pass it on?
First of all to Em, who as a dad often makes me laugh and think.
Second to Evil Spock, just to give him an opportunity to do some PR for his run to POTUS.
And last but not least Tai, cuz she doesn't have enough to do with moving into a nice new house.

My new gadget

As everyone knows, we guys just love the latest gadgets. Yesterday I decided to buy myself a new SLR digital camera. I had been wanting one for a long time and when I stopped off at our neighbourhood Dumoulin store I checked their camera section and lo and behold they had an Olympus Evolt E-500 camera with two lenses for only $580. Now this is a REALLY LOW price. At Costco they had the Canon Rebel xt with 2 lenses for $980 (The two cameras are equivalent in features etc) So after having thought about it and talked to my better half (Mrs. BB) I bought the camera. Turns out that they had got the price wrong but their loss was my gain. ;o)
I can now hear my little sister Jazz saying to herself..."What the hell does he need camera for?" Well I've always loved taking photos, I started off with an Olympus Trip 35 then graduated to a Minolta SRT 201 35 mm camera way back when. (Both cameras still work after 30 years now that's quality.) The Minolta was completely mechanical and almost indestructable but it's heavy and bulky and 35 mm film is getting harder to find and costly to process. So I when I calculated what it cost to get pictures developed versus buying a new camera I decided to buy digital since just the cost of the film and developing paid for the camera. I bought an Olympus Camedia 575 zoom (my son is using it now) and last Christmas I got an Olympus FE-180 (it's small enough to fit in my pocket). These point and shoot cameras take good photos but aren't very flexible, so yesterday I got the Olympus E-550 which gives me much more flexibility than the others.
Taking photos is about as close as I get to being artistic, since I'm pretty much the un-artistic one in my family. I can neither draw or paint like my wife or my sister, nor can I play a musical instrument like my daughter's violin or my wife's classical guitar. Even Jazz used to play the tenor recorder. Hell, I can't even carry a tune in a bucket. So that being said, taking pictures is my way of expressing the artistic yearnings of my soul. (Boy that sure was a load of crap, I just like taking pictures.) So here are a couple of my better ones, enjoy. (The first two were taken with a 35mm film camera and digitalized)

Amadablam with Lhotse in background, Nepal

Gargoyle, Notre Dame de Paris

Beaumaris Castle, Wales

Twighlight on the beach, Achille Island, Ireland

Mountain top, Achille Island, Ireland

Sunset, Tewksbury Abbey, England

York Minster, York, England

PS: If you want to see our other pictures go to our picture site.

Sillines, just plain silliness

It always strikes me as strange how a nation of stiff upper lips like the English can produce such off the wall humour. They bring silliness to a high art form. Of course by now you have probably figured out that I've been watching Monty Python. Though it was made in the 60's it never fails to make me laugh. I've always wondered what it says about my character, after all British humour, from what I can gather by talking to my friends, is either a love it or hate it proposition. It seems to leave nobody indifferent. I admit freely that I find British humour irresistibly funny,
Now for your viewing pleasure, are two of my all time favourite sketches. One of them even has a Canadian connection. ;o) I love the Dead Parrot sketch because of the myriad ways John Cleese finds to tell the clerk that his parrot is demised, deceased, passed on, no more, expired, gone to meet his maker.

The other sketch with the Canadian connection (BC to be exact) is of course the Lumberjack song...the incongruity of a big rugged lumberjack in drag paints a picture that is hard to resist. So here it is, enjoy ;o)
PS: It's a sing along version so go right ahead...

Weird Canada

Since summer vacation is here and is conducive to levity, here is a collection of weird and wonderful little stories from our great country Canada.

WHO WOULD HAVE SUSPECTED?

In April 2001, police in Vancouver, British Columbia, ended a three-year crime spree when they arrested 64 year old Eugene Mah and his 32-year-old son, Avery. The Mahs had been stealing assorted lawn and garden items from homes in their neighborhood, including garbage cans, lawn decorations, recycling boxes, and realty signs. Why did they steal them? Nobody knows. Eugene Mah is a real estate tycoon worth a reported $13 million. One local psychiatrist said the thefts may be due to an obsessive compulsive hoarding disorder. They reportedly stole a neighbor's doormat ... and each of the 14 other doormats the neighbor bought as replacements.

BEAVER FEVER

In June 2003, two disc jockeys in Toronto caused a SARS panic in the Dominican Republic. Z103.5 Morning Show hosts Scott Fox and Dave Blezard thought it would be funny to call the resort where their co-worker, Melanie Martin, was vacationing. They told the desk clerk that Martin had smuggled a "rare Canadian beaver" into their country. But the desk clerk, who didn't speak much English, thought he'd heard the word "fever." With SARS (Severe
Acute Respiratory Syndrome) being big news at the time and Toronto being one of the cities where the disease had spread, the clerk panicked-and locked the woman in her room. The entire hotel wasn't quarantined, according to the station's news manager,' but staff were at the point of contacting medical authorities when the disc jockeys finally convinced them that it was all a misunderstanding. Martin was released from her room that afternoon.

COMING IN FOR A LANDING
Lucette St. Louis, a 66-year-old woman from Corbeil, Ontario, was rounding up three runaway pigs owned by her son, Marc, when she became the victim of a bizarre accident. One of the 180-pound pigs had wandered into the road and a passing car hit it. The impact sent the pig airborne, landing on top of Mrs. St. Louis and breaking her leg in two places. "Well, at least," she said, "I can tell my grandchildren that pigs really do fly."

DEATH MERCHANT

Roman Panchyshyn, a 47-year-old Winnipeg retailer, upset some of his fellow residents when he started selling $65 sweatshirts that read "Winnipeg, Murder Capital of Canada Escape The Fear" in his store. The shirts showed the city skyline dripping in blood. "We spend hundreds of thousands of dollars yearly to promote Winnipeg to the world," complained City Councillor Harry Lazarenko, "and I don't want this to give us a black eye." So he contacted the premier to see if Panchyshyn could be stopped. He couldn't-the shirts are accurate. Winnipeg has the highest murder rate in Canada. Said the unapologetic Panchyshyn, "The truth hurts."

WEIRD CANADIAN RECORDS

• On August 30, 1995, Sean Shannon of Canada recited Hamlet's "To be or not to be" soliloquy in 23.8 seconds an average of 655 words a minute.
• On August 17, 1991, 512 dancers of the Royal Scottish Dance Society (Toronto branch) set the record for the largest genuine Scottish country dance (a reel).
• In 1988 Palm Dairies of Edmonton created the world's largest ice cream sundae 24,900 kg. (54,895 lbs.).
• In 1993 the Kitchener Waterloo Hospital Auxiliary filled a bowl with 2,390 kg (5,269 lbs.) of strawberries.
• Four hundred mothers in Vancouver broke the record for mass breast feeding in 2002.
• In Feb. 2000, 1,588 couples at the Sarnia Sports Centre broke the record for most kissing in one place at one time.
• Dave Pearson holds the record for clearing all 15 balls from a standard pool table in 26.5 seconds at Pepper's Bar in Windsor, Ontario, in 1997.
• In 1998 1,000 University of Guelph students formed the longest human conveyor belt, laying down in a row and rolling a surfboard over their bodies. In 1999 they set the record for simultaneous soap -bubble blowing.

Stories taken from the Bathroom Reader collection, a hilarious collection of strange facts and trivia. For lovers of trivia and weird miscellaneous information, it's a great read.